My beach is nothing like your beach; a normal beach. On a normal beach there would be soft golden sand, and if the tide was in, shimmering blue water. My beach however, instead of fine sand, it is made up of litter and broken sea-shells – deserted for such a long time by anything living. The water is a murky brown and I have never known any different. Perhaps my beach was beautiful once, but now that time is gone.
Friday 15 April 2011
Kidnap Mister Naruto
So for my first post I'll give you something that usually gets the reader laughing (though you might have to watch the show 'Naruto' to get the humor). It's my rendition of 'Kidnap the Sandyclaws' from The Nightmare Before Christmas (Put the song on as you read, it helps!)
Kidnap Mr. Naruto
Konan, Deidara and Sasori left Pein’s office in silence. They walked down the corridor together and then they began to think of the upcoming mission…
'Konan: Kidnap Mister Naruto?
Deidara: I wanna do it!
Sasori: No way hoe!
Konan: Pein said we should work together.
Sasori: Three of a kind!
Deidara: Birds of a feather!
All: Now and forever! La-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la! Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, he’s really not that bright, jump on him and make him scream, give him such a fright!
Konan: First we’re going to set some bait (ramen) inside a nasty trap and wait. When he comes a’ sniffing we will snap the trap and close the gate!
Sasori: Wait! I’ve got a better plan to catch that stupid foxy man! Let’s pop him in a boiling pot and when he’s done we’ll puppet him up!
All: Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, let’s rip out that fox, take over some villages, we are gonna’ rock!
Konan: Then Mister Crazy-Immortal man, can take the whole thing over then!
All: He’ll be so please I do declare, that he will skin him bare! Weeee~!
Deidara: I say that we take a lit bomb; leave it on his door and then, knock three times and when he answers, Naruto will be no more!
Konan: (smacks Deidara on head) you’re so stupid! Think now, if we blow him up to smithereens, we may lose some pieces and then Pein will beat us black and green!
All: Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, make him really sad, beat him up with ramen-sticks, see if he gets mad. Because Pein and the Akatsuki are the meanest guys around, if I were on their target list, I’d get out of town…
Deidara: They’ll be so please by are success,
Sasori: That they’ll reward us too I’ll bet!
Both: Perhaps they’ll make the special brew, of miso-ramen stew!
All: We’re Pein’s little henchmen and we take our jobs with pride, we do our best to please him, and stay on his good side.
Konan: I wish my cohorts weren’t so gay!
Deidara: I’m not the gay one!
Sasori: (rolls eyes) yeah…no way [sarcastic] (dodges low flying C1 bomb)
Konan: SHUT UP!
Deidara: Make me!
Konan: I’ve got something; listen now, this one is real’ good you’ll see! We’ll send a (gigantic) toy fox to his door, upon there’ll be a note to read. Now in the fox we’ll wait and hide, until his large stupidity, entices him to bring it in, and then we’ll have him…
Deidara: Ka-ching!
All: Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, poke him in the eyes, break his arms and crack his back, tell him lots of lies. Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat; chop him into bits, Mister Crazy Immortal-man is sure to get his kicks! Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, see what he can see, (A/N: He can’t see! You’ve already poked him in the eyes!) Lock him in a cage and then throw away the keee-EEEy…!'
Konan started to giggle as they continued walking along the corridor and out of the exit to the base. Kisame, who had been listening to the whole thing from further down the hall, said to himself in a terrified whisper,
“…W-w-what…what just happened? THEY ALL BURST IN TO SONG?!" He threw his hands over his head, "THEY’VE ALL GONE CRAZY!”
Itachi walked up behind Kisame and said quietly,
“Haven’t they always been crazy?”
Kisame, who hadn’t sensed Itachi coming up behind him, jumped a foot in the air and then fainted on the spot.
Itachi smirked and walked off.
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