'Lights' - Requested Naruto One-shot

It was a dark and stormy night in Konoha. The streets were deserted, and rain lashed like a whip. Sarah was huddled in a blanket in her living room, eyes glued to the television. She was supposed to be at an extra training session with her team, but no way was she venturing out into that! When she saw them tomorrow, she was sure they would understand.

Never the less, when there were three sharp raps against her front door, she could not help but jump. She got up; blanket wrapped firmly around her, and walked to the door as she quickly began to think of an excuse to explain why she was missing training.

With one – not brilliant but usable – excuse in mind, she pulled open the front door, but instead of seeing her Sensei or another of her team-mates, she saw her friend, Ino, shivering and cold but with a determined grin on her face.

“Oh good! Sarah, you're in!” Without being invited Ino walked through the door, passing Sarah by, into the hallway where she proceeded to try and dry out her hair, “It's a bit wet outside.”

Looking down at the trail of water that had followed Ino into her house, Sarah nodded,

“No kidding?” She looked up from the pool on her floor, to Ino, “So why were you crazy enough to venture out into the storm, in that?” she said, pointing disbelievingly at Ino's usual attire of short purple clothing, a few bandages and nothing else – not even a jacket. Ino, after giving up on attempting to dry herself off, gave Sarah a wink, tapping the side of her nose. This seemed to worry Sarah more than any verbal answer could have done.

“What are you up to?” Sarah demanded. Ino, seeing her friend's expression, giggled.

“Don't look so worried, Sarah! It's nothing bad-”

“So it is something?”

Ino winked again, beginning to put her hand into her side-bag,

“Well of course.” She produced a small pouch from her bag, no bigged than her hand. Sarah looked at it suspiciously but before she had time to ask about it, Ino was already holding it out towards her,

“Pull out the first thing you grab.”

Sarah stepped back, attempting to hide her hands deep within the blanket around her so that Ino could never find them.

“Why should I? What's the bag?”

At this, Ino began to pout,

“Why so suspicious all of a sudden?”

“Last time you told me to do this,” Sarah reminded, “I pulled out a-...” her face paled at the memory. Ino laughed, waving her free hand about in the air,

“I already told you it wasn't me! It was that Naruto kid, using transformation jutsu – I swear!”

Quickly giving up the attempt to get out of putting her hand in the bag, Sarah decided to give Ino a small jab to her pride, instead. Holding her hand out in defeat, she smirked,

“Yeah, it was Naruto. A likely story.”

Ino flipped her hair,

“It's true. Where would I have been able to get one of those things, anyway?” A grin grew on her face and she undid the fastening on the pouch, then held it out for Sarah, “Now pick one.”

Sarah, looking at the fabric pouch with suspicion one final time, closed her eyes and slipped her hand between the folds of the fabric, praying she would not feel anything slimy.

She didn't. What she felt were undoubtedly pieces of paper, and lots of them. Following the instructions of her friend, Sarah grabbed the first piece of paper that ran between her fingers and fished it out of the bag. She held it out in front of her, then opened it, looking at what was written there. Ino, once she had slipped the pouch back into her bag and had produced a small notepad, asked,

“What number did you get?”

Author:// "It really makes me laugh"

Well, since I'm always writing on here I thought I'd take a moment to stop and say Merry Christmas and a happy New Year! Here's a Christmas story for you! Also, I'd just like to say thank you; thank you to my followers, and also to everyone who uses a search engine to find my blog.

You may not know this, but I know exactly what you type in on the search engine before you come to my blog (it's a little bloggers' tool ;D), and dear God they don't half make me laugh :) OK, I've had the obvious 'Akatsuki 7 minutes in heaven' but then I've had some great ones like 'Tobi trip over tent pole' and 'Yazoo final fantasy plait heaven' xD They never cease to amuse me. It's also nice, because it shows you know about my work, remember it, and are able to search for it using what you remember (hence 'Tobi trip over tent pole')

So yeah, just thought I'd stop to say hey - I haven't written a personal entry on this thing yet, so I thought I should - and a thank you for making me smile! Have no fear, you'll be getting another wave of stories just as soon as the New Year's in!

Love, Sarah xx

Loveless: {Genesis x You One-shot}

            (Posted originally as a 10k profile hit commemoration on Quizilla)         

You walk with a spring in your step on the way to your house, your school bag slung over a shoulder and a small pile of books and folders clustered in your arms. You let out a happy whistle as you turn the next corner, deciding to take a short cut home. You are in a little bit of a hurry.

            Earlier today your mother sent you a text saying that the book you had ordered has finally arrived. It is probably sat in your bedroom right now. You clench your school books closer to your chest, tickling with anticipation and excitement. The book you have ordered is the first volume of 'Loveless' – a series of manga about a boy with cat ears, trying to find his brother. You can't wait!

You speed up, trying to get home faster. You dodge a large group of younger students from your school, rolling your eyes at them. Why they have to walk in such large groups that walk so slowly, you have no idea. You leave them in the distance behind you, almost coming into a sprint now. You are not too far away; in fact you can see the light blue slating of your roof. You grin, securing a hand over your book bag, then run the last few meters to your front gate. You hop over it – momentarily looking back, surprised that you managed to clear it (usually you fall flat on your face) – then run up to your front door.

            You shuffle the books around in your arms, dropping a couple, then with one free hand you knock on wood. You pause. No one answers. You begin to bounce on the balls of your feet, hoping that your parents haven't stepped out for a quick errand. You hadn't picked up your key this morning, and it would be luck that now is the first time you've ever needed it. There's about another few seconds of waiting, then you give a small sigh of relief when the door is unlatched.

            Feeling you've wasted too much time already, even before the door's been pulled back you set off moving, pushing what remains of your pile of books out in front of you. Your mother manages to get the door just wide enough to stop you from colliding into it painfully, then you push your books into her hands and dart past her, dropping your school bag in the hallway.

            “___!” your mother yells scornfully, looking at the collection of books spilling from her hands, and some still left to wallow out in the garden. You look over your shoulder and call back,

            “Sorry! I'll get them in a minute!” by this time you're already up the stairs and on the landing. You dash along to your room and fling open the door, whereas down below your mother can only roll her eyes, laughing slightly at your over-enthusiasm. You manage to slow down once your door's open and you're inside. You can see the package sitting on your bedside table. It's at this point that you finally sigh, panting slightly. You know for a fact that all that running you've just done is going to come back to bite you tomorrow. You'll be as stiff as a bone.

            You kick your school-shoes off, slackening off your tie at the same time. You walk across the floor to one side of your bed and flop down onto it, pausing slightly to take in the comfortable feeling of your cotton blankets, then shuffle across so that your hands are just reaching over the other side of the bed, where they are in reach of the package. You wrap your fingers around the brown packaging and pull it up, dropping it in front of you with the sound of someone letting the air out of a beach-ball. You stare at it, your face breaking out in a grin then pull it towards you; needy hands grasping at the packaging to tear it all away.

            Below the layer of cardboard box there is another layer of bubble-wrap, wound so tightly that the book in the middle is barely noticeable for all of the compressed pockets of air. Nevertheless your hands work quickly, pulling the protective layer away, earning the occasional pop that makes you laugh. You will be playing with that later. You strip the thing bare then turn it over so the front cover of the book is looking up at you. You grin. It looks so... regal.

            The cover is a layer of white bound on top of a brown leathering with thin rope, held in place with four ornate, golden metal corner pieces. The decoration on the cover is very simple. In the top centre of the book there is the title 'LOVELESS' in golden lettering, surrounded by a boarder of ornate stencils, then below it there is - what you can only presume to be - a flower made of four golden circles, each holding a heart inside them. Below that are the words 'Legends of the LOVELESS' and the author of the book – whose name you have never heard of before, but of course that's expected as it had been your friend who had suggested the series to you in the first place. You have no idea who's written it.

            You give a giddy giggle, taking the book firmly in your hands, then flip to the first page. That's when you stop. You study the page, your eyebrows slowly pulling down into a frown, then flip to the next page, then the next, then the next. You take a better grip on the book then pull your thumb up the side, flicking through the pages. It's all writing. This isn't right. Your friend told you that this book is a manga – a Japanese cartoon book... so why is it all in writing? You flick back to the first page and start to read it,

            When the war of the beast brings about world's end the goddess descends from the sky. Wings of light and dark spread far-

            You put the book down. This isn't right at all. You close the book, dusting your hand lightly over the cover, then pull yourself up to  a sitting position. Hmm. You look around. There, on the floor, is the cardboard box it had arrived in. You lean down and pick it up, flipping it to look at the collection of stamps.

            There. Now you realise the problem. Looking across the many many foreign stamps – some of which you've never even heard of – you come to realise that this book 'LOVELESS' is not your Loveless. You are expecting your package to have come from across America, whereas this package has come from somewhere called... Midgar? You've never heard of the place. You flex your fingers, thinking things over. There must be more than one book under the same title then. You curse under your breath. This means there must have been a mix-up at the post-office or something, and that means you have someone's 'LOVELESS', and that same someone has your 'Loveless' instead. Damn. You've been looking forward to reading your new book ever since you'd gotten the text.

You drop the packaging onto your bed, next to the book, then flop backwards so your head crashes against your pillow, a pout on your lips. Your Loveless could be anywhere now. Half way across the world for all you know. Where is 'Midgar' anyway? It sounds almost Norwegian.

            That's when a thought hits you. You roll onto your side and pick up the packaging again, twirling it round in your fingers to find something. Of course what you're looking for is on the bottom. The address. Why it's on the bottom of the package you have no idea. That's probably the reason your package got mixed in the first place. You read over the words of where this package was meant to have been sent, expecting it to be a foreign country. What you don't expect is it to be in the same neighbourhood as you.

            With the address firmly burnt into your mind you jump up from the bed, landing on your carpeted floor with a loud thud. You scoop up the confounded 'LOVELESS', stuff it back into the cardboard box (making sure to leave the bubble-wrap for you to play with later), then slip back into your school shoes and head out the door. You charge along the landing, not bothering to miss treading on your baby brother's pile of stuffed toys, down the stairs and into the living room. In the same breath you manage to say,

            “MumwhereisthisaddressIneedtoknowIwanttogetmybookback?!” you thrust the package forward, holding the address out for you mother to look at. She takes a moment to blink, staring wide-eyed at you as what you've just said processes in her mind. As it all settles down she begins to realise why you're holding a torn up cardboard box for her. She takes it from you and looks at the barely legible address, then holds it away from her so she can think properly.

            “That's... well that's a couple of streets over. That's the same street the post office's on!” She hands you back the package. “Now what was that about needed to get a book back?”

            Too late. You're already out the door. You're already half way down the street.

Christmas Time: {Axel x You One-shot}

            You cupped your hands in front of your face, blowing warm air in to them to stop them from going numb, then quickly shoved them down into the pockets of your thick winter coat. It was a nice day out, you had to admit, even if it was a little cold. There were thick blankets of snow on the ground, the sun was shining brightly from above, and everyone around you was enjoying their time at the festive Christmas markets.

            The Christmas market was one of your favourite things about the holidays, with hundreds of stalls dedicated to selling baubles and mulled wine, toys and chocolates, everything you could possibly need at Christmas time. But the shops weren't the only things you liked about the market. There were also the events that went on, such as the best dressed Santa competition, the ice-sculpting competition, and of course the bonfire at night where everyone came together to sing festive songs. Yes, it was safe to say that the Christmas market was one of your favourite things about the holidays.

            Turning away from a small stall selling Christmas cookies, you grinned, hearing a sudden childish scream of delight coming from the frozen lake, not too far away. You decided then to go and watch, feeling that maybe it was a little too cold for you to go ice-skating, but warm enough for you to, at least, see others having fun.

            You walked over to the railing that separated the frozen lake from the street and leant on it with your arms dangling over the other side, a smile on your face as you saw some of the other children you knew skating around in circles – some more successfully than others, as you watched a thin boy with short blonde hair try to do an intricate spin on one foot to try and impress his female friend, only he quickly lost his balance and ended up on the floor, his female friend and his other, more rounded friend with spiky brown hair, laughing at him.

            There were couples on the ice as well, skating hand-in-hand with each other, and even a set of instructors to teach the little ones how to skate for the first time. The instructors were all dressed in black coats, some with fluffy black hoods up, hiding their faces, to cover them from the chill.

Too busy staring at the many people skating together, you did not notice someone skate up to the railings that you were leaning on. You only noticed the person after they had turned round, leant their elbows against the railings, next to you, turned their head and had started to speak,

            “Do you want to have a go?”

            You turned your head to look at the person, only there was a black, fluffy hood hiding their face,

            “What? Oh- well I don't know. It's a little cold to be-”

            The person raised their hands to the hood, pulling it down, revealing their - slightly more beautiful than you had been expecting - face.

            “Excuses, excuses. I've heard them all before.” The hood was dropped low enough for you to make out a mass of red, spiky hair, and a pair of bright green eyes that looked playfully at you, “The name's Axel.” He tapped the side of his head with a finger, smirking, “Got it memorised?”

            Surprised by Axel's confident personality, you laughed, but then when you noticed he was looking confusedly at you, you decided not to be rude, and gave a half-hearted attempt to defend yourself,

            “That wasn't an excuse; it is too cold.”

            Axel shook his head, grabbing hold of the railings with one hand, then pushed away and span around so he was facing you, his hands coming to rest so that both of your hands were boxed in by his,

            “So what's your name?”

            “____,” you replied, giving him what you hoped was a friendly smile, despite the fact that your teeth were chattering slightly. He nodded, giving you another smirk,

            “Okay, ____, I'm going to take a wild guess and say you've never skated before?”

            Well, that wasn't entirely true. You had been skating quite a few times before, actually, but never on a frozen lake. You were used to skating on levelled-off ice-rinks where there was no chance of hitting a bump and falling flat on your face. Axel noticed your hesitant expression and smiled again, this time in a more reassuring manner,

            “Come on, it'll be fun! If you're worried about the cold, then I've got enough body heat for the both of us, and don't worry, you won't fall. I'll make sure of it.”

            You pursed your lips, weighing it up in your mind. You were a little cold, yes, but from the happy sounds you could hear coming from the natural ice-rink, you decided, what the heck, you may as well. You nodded at Axel, smiling,

            “Okay,”

            Axel, happy he had coaxed you into skating, pushed back from the railings slightly, grinning,

            “Great.”

            “Oh! But I don't have any skates with me.”

           As Axel began to skate sideways, motioning for you to follow him, he said,

            “Don't worry. You can borrow some from us.” He pointed to a small shack by the edge of the lake, where a man with bright pink, overly-flamboyant hair was sitting behind a screen, taking money and handing out skates to customers.

            “Okay then,” You could tell that there was no way you were going to get out of this, even if it was too cold - and it was too cold; you could see your breath as a white cloud in front of your face.

            Axel, seeing you following him, skated off ahead, over to the shack. At the point when any normal person would have crashed into the shack for travelling at such a high speed, Axel managed to do a hockey stop, spraying ice-shavings into the screen, behind which sat the man with pink hair. He looked quite alarmed.

            “Axel, what are you doing?”

            “Showing off,” he said bluntly. Axel turned to the screen, placing his hands on the small ledge in front of it, then said, “Marluxia, take the price of a pair of skates out of my wages, would ya'?”

            “Sure,” he said, already beginning to scribble things down onto a piece of paper, “but why?”

            When there was no reply, Marluxia looked up, only to find that Axel had already skated off and was currently stood with a pretty girl by the side of the shack, helping her to find some skates that fit. He rolled his eyes.

            Now wearing a comfortable pair of skates – already broken in by the many uses of other people – you walked across to the edge of the lake with Axel just ahead of you, then he stepped out first, skating just a short distance away, then turned and waited for you. You were quick to follow, quite confident in your ability to skate. You stepped out onto the ice, giving yourself a bit of a push with the railings, and came to a gentle stop in front of Axel. He raised an eyebrow, a hand finding its way onto his hip,

Akatsuki Night In: Seven Minutes in Heaven

“Let's play seven minutes in heaven!” you yell enthusiastically – too enthusiastically. Everyone else in the room looks at you with one or both eyebrows raised, but you shrug it off. After your outburst it goes quiet for a moment, then Itachi points out, deciding to enlighten those that haven't already noticed,

“There's no point playing that game. ____, you're the only girl here.”

You smile devilishly, helping everyone realise your true intentions behind this game,

“I know, which means it's more likely two of you guys will have to go in together!” You make a kissing face, to which Hidan gives you the finger,

“Fuck off! I'm not doing it!”

You glare at him, not liking that he won't take part. That's just like Hidan.

“Oh come on!” You change tactics and give him a playful wink, “You might end up with me.”

This only makes him turn his head, folding his arms over his chest in the process,

“Even more reason not to!”

Your jaw drops open,

“Hidan you-”

Luckily the loudness of everyone's laughter manages to censor the second half of your sentence. Once everything is quiet again Pein, shrouded by the shadows at the back of the room, decides to speak,

“Well then ____, as no one has suggested a better option, we will take yo-”

“LET'S DO A FUCKING DRINKING GA-”

'Clang'

“-As you were saying, Leader?” You say with a grin, having momentarily knocked Hidan unconscious with a kunai to the head. Pein continues,

“We will take your idea and play seven minutes in heaven.” he pauses, “but as you suggested it, you will be going first.”

This causes many cat-calls. You nod,

“Sure!” You know that the faster you're in and gone, the sooner you can get other people in together, and the better chance you have at getting provocative photographs. Photographs you can later sell for much needed money.

Itachi points something out again, able to tell what you're thinking by the look on your face,

“____, there really is no point to this game. If you are not willing to do anything with one of the other members, what makes you think they will do anything with each other?”

You go to retort something about how you're sure they're all batting for the other team anyway, but Pein comments first, a slight amount of amusement swirling in his voice,

“Fair point, Itachi.” He becomes quiet, forcing all of you to look into the shadow where he is sat, then something small comes whirling out of it at you. Deidara goes to grab it but you're faster and catch it between your middle fingers. You pull it in and study it.

“A lipstick tube?”

Some of the other members catch on before you do and cat-call again. Pein explains,

“With each pair that enters, they must at least kiss each other. The lipstick stain will be proof.”

Kisame mumbles, digging Itachi in the ribs as he laughs,

“And Leader just happened to have some lipstick on him?”

Pein says from the shadows, firmly,

“It's Konan's.”

This causes a ripple of chuckles; chuckles from everyone but Zetsu. His black side grumbles to his white side,

“First we're getting locked in a room with some creep, now we're putting on make-up-”

“What's next? Boosting the time up to half an hour and making us give them a lap dance?”

The room is quiet. The other members dart their eyes to the back of the room, hoping Pein hasn't just had another brilliant idea.

“Half an hour sounds better, in my opinion.” Damn. “But no lap-dances are needed.” It could be worse!

Many of the others turn to glare at Zetsu. He gives them an innocent look; not realising everyone has heard the conversation between his two halves.

So now, faced with a game of 'Thirty minutes in heaven and you to have to kiss them or suffer the consequences', it comes as no surprise when a large population of the males decide they don't want to play. Unfortunately they have no opinion in the matter. They are playing. It comes as a little less of a blow to them, even for Hidan, when you're reminded that you have to be the first one to go into the closet, or more, since they don't have a closet, Tobi's room as it's the nearest.

So once the game is set up, all the boys having drawn something on pieces of paper and put it in Pein's Kasa, the bamboo hat is passed to you and you are told to draw a piece of paper from it. You drop your hand in hurriedly, wanting to get your turn over with as soon as possible, but also you have a small part of you that wants to see who you're spending your time with. It's half of the fun, after all.

You open the piece of paper, looking over the drawing, then immediately you scrunch up the paper, slip it in your pocket and call out,

Writing Exercise: Character Alphabet - Sapphire (c)

This exercise will check how familiar you are with your character, and help you to develop them. Starting with the letter 'A' you must create a phrase, clause or sentence beginning with that letter, that your character could say to describe their personality. E.g. the dodo from Lewis Caroll's 'Alice in Wonderland': 'A' - "Ahoy, and other nautical expressions!"
---------
Sapphire:
---------
A: "All I know is I'm stuck this way."
B: "But I can't! It's too hard!"
C: "Come on. Let's go. We've been cooped up in here for way too long."
D: "Do you really think I like being this way?"
E: "Every time I think about it, it just gets more confusing."
F: "For God's sake, this is ridiculous!"
G: "Got to keep our spirits up, 'ey Kai?"
H: "He's so... wonderful."
I: "I can't wait! It's going to be so much fun. Fancy dresses, and dancing. What's not to love?"
J: "Just stay- stay away from me!"
K: "Kai, I've known you way too long for that to work on me. Nice try."
L: "Leave me alone! I- I don't want to hurt you."
M: "Maybe I was looking at it all wrong?"
N: "No, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry."
O: "Oh Kai, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I made you come here."
P: "Please tell me this is suppose to happen?"
Q: "Quick! Please! You've got to help him!"
R: "Real smooth."
S: "So you did it... for me?"
T: "Thanks. You're a real friend."
U: "Unless you've got some chocolate, I'm not paying attention."
V: "Very nice! You look great, Kai. I don't know what you're complaining about!"
W: "Where's Sasukie? Why did he... why did he do this? It can't have been him."
X: "X-rays are going to help! I was there! I can tell you what happened if it's faster."
Y: "You try clearing your head when there's someone with wings in front of you, then!"
Z: "(a) Zebra!? Are you crazy!? I can't go round looking like a Zebra for the rest of my life! Help!"
----------
Footnote: Most of these are quotes, and therefore copy-righted by WinterMoonz (2008-2012). Do not use without the author's permission.

Writing Exercise: Character Alphabet - Kai (c)

This exercise will check how familiar you are with your character, and help you to develop them. Starting with the letter 'A' you must create a phrase, clause or sentence beginning with that letter, that your character could say to describe their personality. E.g. the dodo from Lewis Caroll's 'Alice in Wonderland': 'A' - "Ahoy, and other nautical expressions!"
---------
Kai:
---------
A: "All right! Let's get this show on the road!"
B: "But you said you were okay. Why did you lie to me?"
C: "Can't a guy read a book without someone jumping him?"
D: "Do we have to?"
E: "Every time I look at her, I know I made the right choice. It's my fault after all."
F: "For once, I'm glad you picked him over me."
G: "Great! I can't wait to see what it looks like."
H: "Have you hit your head or something? Sasukie? SERIOUSLY?"
I: "I got this for you, Sapphire. I hope you like it."
J: "Just because she likes you doesn't mean I won't fight you for her."
K: "Kai's the name."
L: "Like I'm gonna' believe that. I can read you like a book, Sapphire."
M: "Maybe I can help?"
N: "Now's a good time to get back at them."
O: "Only you could think of something like that."
P: "Please tell me you didn't just eat that?"
Q: "Quick! This way!"
R: "Right... so I'm supposed to be the third wheel here?"
S: "Sshhh. It's okay. It was just a dream."
T: "This IS my natural hair colour! Honestly!"
U: "Uh... maybe next time I should pick out my own clothes, okay Sapphire?"
V: "Very funny. Now help me up, would you?"
W: "What do you think? Should we go?"
X: "Excellent! I knew you could do it!"
Y: "You... kissed him?"
Z: - (it's impossible to think of something Kai would say beginning with Z xD)
----------
Footnote: Most of these are quotes, and therefore copy-righted by WinterMoonz (2008-2012). Do not use without the author's permission.

Writing Exercise: Character Alphabet - Sasukie (c)

This exercise will check how familiar you are with your character, and help you to develop them. Starting with the letter 'A' you must create a phrase, clause or sentence beginning with that letter, that your character could say to describe their personality. E.g. the dodo from Lewis Caroll's 'Alice in Wonderland': 'A' - "Ahoy, and other nautical expressions!"
---------
Sasukie:
---------
A: "And once again you have failed to catch her attention."
B: "Beauty is aesthetic. I have no admiration for such a thing."
C: "Cooking is not a hobby as such; it simply a necessary skill to survive on my own."
D: "Do not think for a second I would value your life over my own. I have a job that no one else can fulfil."
E: "Every time you try to beat me, know you will fail."
F: "For the last time, clear your head or else you will hurt yourself."
G: "Go. You need to fulfil your role, Sapphire. We will be fine here."
H: "Ha-! Oh, I mean... Kai, you should really watch your back."
I: "In case you had not noticed, I am doing this of my own accord. I can stop training you any time I want."
J: "Just in case you are wondering, I do not intend to have relations with her."
K: "Kai is an idiot."
L: "Lives are lost every day. You should not cry for someone, as it will never bring them back."
M: "My feelings? Do they really matter to you?"
N: "Normally I would not do this, but you seem to be a... special case."
O: "Organise your thoughts, collect them and store them away. Let your mind become blank."
P: "Please do be quiet, Kai. You may not have noticed, but you are making Sapphire feel worse."
Q: "Quite the friend you have, Sapphire. It seems he will do anything for you."
R: "Really now, is it so hard to concentrate on what I am saying, rather than how I look?"
S: "Sapphire! Stop struggling. It will pass in a second."
T: "Time you went to bed. It has been a long day, and we are continuing tomorrow."
U: "Until I met you, my trails of thoughts were much easier to attend to."
V: "Value your friends when there is nothing else left. When the time comes they may just save your life."
W: "Why do you consistently find a way to annoy me?"
X: "Excitement will only break open the wound. I am cancelling training today, and I will lock Kai in his room so you can rest."
Y: "You... must get... away from here... Sapphire..."
Z: "Zooming around will get you no where but lost."
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Footnote: Most of these are quotes, and therefore copy-righted by WinterMoonz (2008-2012). Do not use without the author's permission.

Sweets - Requested Story

L liked sweets. Some could say he liked sweets more than solving the Kira case. Some could EVEN say he valued his deluxe waffle cinnamon cake over Matsuda's life.
That was true up until the day he met Lil. She showed up in the office as a new intern; one of Soichiro's apprentices. She stood with one hand in her pocket, the other holding a large lolly-pop. L was already intrigued. She noticed his gaze and smiled at him; her eyes creasing up at the edges, then she did something that surprised L. She waved. Now what surprised him the most was that he found himself waving back.
Light nudged him, seeing his gaze averted from the monitors for the first time in two hours.
"What's up with you, Ryuzaki?"

A Halloween Short Story

Her heart pounded. Her breathing was fast. Her eyes were wide.

Sally sat with her body wrapped around a large pillow, her eyes barely peeping over the top of it at the television screen. She winced and shut her eyes tight, hearing the girl scream as the chainsaw revved,

“WHY DO YOU PEOPLE HATE ME?” She yelled in protest, aiming her voice at the other side of the bedroom door. A lot of snickering was heard, then a girl's voice called back; sounding as smug as possible,
“We don't hate you! We just want to make you suffer!”
 
“But that's not fair! It's not my fault I didn-”

“-You didn't do your dare, so now you're paying the price. It's only fair.”

Once Upon a Time

Once upon a time,

When the world was still new,

There once sat a fairy,

And a Unicorn too.

Theme 13 - Traitor {Naruto & Sasuke}

The cold winds blew. The powdered snow on the ground picked up and twirled in front of Naruto's face, although he didn't notice it. He was concentrating on his mission. He, along with Sakura, Sasuke and Kakashi, crouched behind a large banking of snow, waiting for their targets to make a move. So far it had been a good quarter of an hour and nothing had happened. It seemed as though the targets were waiting as well.

Naruto suddenly sprang up, yelling as he always did when he was impatient,

“That's it! I'm going in and taking them out myself, believe it! They won't stand a chance against my-” Three pairs of hands pulled him down and Sakura clamped her hand over Naruto's mouth,

“Shut up, Naruto,” she hissed angrily, “Do you want to blow our cover!?”

Naruto's eyes flashed from the murderous face of Sakura, across to Sasuke who was shaking his head in disbelief. He sagged his shoulders,

“Sorry,” he said, his voice muffled by Sakura's gloved hand. Kakashi rolled his eyes. Naruto was always the one to jump first and think later.

All four eyes looked up, suddenly hearing something flying over-head. Naruto spotted it first and, taking this as a signal, jumped up with his own weapons ready,

Theme 12 - Wall {Kakashi x You}

Atop of the high walls that encircled your house, you could see for miles and miles easily; your vision only being interrupted by the larger walls that protected the village. It gave you almost a birds-eye-view of Konoha, as you lived on a row of houses situated on the top of a hill.

It was early evening and the sun was beginning to set. The sky was a pool of reds and purples, casting the village into shadow.

You tapped your heels gently back and forth against the bricks of the wall, a sketchpad held in one hand, a pencil in the other and a small box of paints sat next to you. With a view as nice as this, you knew it would be a shame not to recreate it on paper.

You brushed your pencil against the paper again, defining the half-circle of the sun.

It wasn’t often that you climbed the walls; it was too troublesome. On your side of the wall stood a large oak-tree; surrounded by many small bramble-patches. Though what were a few bruises when it came to art?

Theme 11 - Masquerade {Itachi x You}

What a bad idea. It had been a bad idea then and it was a bad idea now.

You were walking down the corridor of what could only be described as a mansion, wearing a dress that would be more suited on a prom-queen, and the mask of a bird covering the top half of your face.

This is not how you had planned to spend your Saturday but yesterday Sakura had shown up at our door telling you to pick a number and throwing a bird-mask at you, then told you to come here and meet your ‘knight in shining armour’.

So here you were, not knowing where you were going - the signs saying ‘this way idiot’ in Sakura’s handwriting being a big help. You arrived at the end of the corridor, stopping in front of a door three times your size. On it was a small white envelope.

Theme 10 - Kiss {Kiba}

There are many types of kiss in the world; a Peck, the French, the Vacuum, Eskimo, Butterfly, Quickie, Mistletoe-

Theme 9 - Fear {Naruto & Konohamaru}

“C’mon Konohamaru! If you don’t eat ‘em you’ll never be strong enough to become Hokage!” Naruto whined in a failed attempt to get his mission complete. Yes, Naruto Uzumaki’s job was to get Konohamaru, grandson of the third Hokage, to eat his vegetables.

Theme 8 - House With the Picket Fence {Deidara x You}

You lay in Deidara’s arms, his head resting lazily atop of yours. The pair of you were having a peaceful day in the base after both coming back from separate missions; his an assassination, yours an infiltration of Suna.

The rest of the members were still out on their missions apart from Sasori and Kakuzu, but they kept themselves locked in their rooms, giving the pair of you some time to yourselves.

You rolled over, lazily lacing your arms around his neck. He smiled, leaning forward slightly to kiss the bridge of your nose.

Theme 7 - Flower {Shikamaru x You}

It had been two months since you’d first arrived in Konoha and now - after finally unpacking the last box - you had time to relax.

On the far side of Konoha stood the hills that helped to conceal the village. It was here that you'd learnt to visit when you wanted to be alone. It was a ten minute walk from your house so you went there regularly.

Theme 6 - False Threat {Lee x Tenten}

“Leaf hurricane!”

The earth in a mile radius trembled with the sheer power of the blow. As the ground began to calm itself, Lee stood to his fullest height and wiped his enormous brow. Looking at the cracked tree-stump in front of him he said; flames starting to burn in his eyes,

“Still it is not good enough to beat Naruto!” He pumped his fists, readying himself to try another attack on the defenceless tree-stump. It was only when Tenten appeared with her hands shielding her head that he faltered his stance.

Theme 5 - Story {Zabuza x Haku}

When Haku had first met Zabuza there had been uncertainty between the two; Haku having been brought up as he had been, found it a little difficult to trust the older ninja. Seeing this as a problem for the future, Zabuza took it upon himself to gain the young-one’s trust. He did this using the age-old method of telling stories.

Theme 4 - Frustration {Hidan & Tobi}

A small vein appeared on Hidan’s forehead as he listened to the oh-so-happy (oh-so-unwelcome) voice of the orange-masked boy, Tobi. He had been given the gruelling task of ‘baby-sitting’ the masked-nin whilst both Deidara and Zetsu were away on missions. Now, after an hour and a half of ‘I’m a little tea-pot’ sung repeatedly and never once in tune, Hidan was almost at breaking point.

Theme 3 - Don't Go {Kimimaro x Juugo}

The darkened hallways were silent as always, though not deserted in the least. Rows upon rows of cells lined the halls, each holding one or two people too scared to mutter the slightest breath- except for two cells. Two people. Two friends.

Kimimaro sat by the barred-grates that were his left cell wall and held back a chesty cough to the best of his abilities. The boy on the other side of the bars frowned.

“I wish you didn’t have to go...”

Theme 2 - Smile {Sai x Sakura}

For the third time that evening Sakura slammed her head onto the desk in defeat. How could such a simple task be such a hard thing to do!? Sakura couldn’t understand it.

Sat across from her on the other side of the desk Sai tilted his head, a Cheshire-cat-like grin on his face.

“Am I not doing it right, Ugly?”

Theme 1 - Happy {Naruto}

Moving was never an easy task. There was the packing, the hauling boxes to the van, saying good bye to friends, teachers, lovers, and so on. Then when you arrive at the new place you’re automatically labelled the outcast. You don’t know anyone and everyone looks at you with distaste. It’s hard to make new friends and you generally want to sink into the floor.

Akatsuki Night In: Snuggle Bug

“How about we play snuggle-bug?” You say merrily. It has been a long long time since you'd last played it; so long in fact that it was before your time in Akatsuki.

Everyone looks at you for a second, then the majority nod, strange looks in their eyes. You notice.

“W-what?” You ask anxiously. They don't reply so you decide to quickly set up the game, brushing it off. You rip up a piece of paper so that there are ten pieces, then as you go to write 'snuggle-bug' on one of them, you feel a hand close over yours. You look up to see Pein standing over you,

“Sir?”

“I'll do that, if it's alright with you.” He says quietly. You know he's not asking but you reply anyway,

“Oh, yes, that's fine.”

You stand up and give the pen to Pein. He sits down and picks up one of the pieces of paper. You look away as he writes the words down, only to see half of the males in the room looking at you.

“What!?”

They don't look away; in fact those that hadn't been looking at you, look as well instead.

'Oh great...- weirdos.'

Just then Pein rises to his feet. The game is ready to begin. He walks around the room, each member taking a piece of paper from him, then he arrives at you last. You take the paper from him and open it.

Akatsuki Night In: Camping

You smile, an idea popping into your head,

“Let’s go camping!”

No one says anything – then Itachi points out from his armchair,

“We go camping on missions all the time.”

You nod, agreeing,

“Yeah, we do, but I don’t mean camping like that; I mean proper camping! With camp-fires and marshmallows and staying up at night making shadow-puppets on the side of the tent!” Again, silence. You sweat-drop, “Aww, come on guys, it will be fun!”

Pein is the first to reply to your idea, sat hidden in shadows at the back of the room,

“I think…that that is actually quite a good idea, ____.” He hears a few protests but continues, “It could be a very good bonding experience and can change the way we look at camping; not having to get up early in the morning to carry on moving.”

You grin; glad someone is supporting you,

“Yeah! Exactly!”

A few of the other members – now looking at camping in a different light – agree with you, thinking it will probably be alright, though a few still complain.

Nevertheless at 7:00pm sharp, all members of Akatsuki make their way from the base carrying tents, sleeping bags and other equipment, heading deep into the surrounding forest. Pein has bullied them into going whether they want to or not.

You walk for a good twenty minutes until you make it to a small coveted area; perfect for setting up the tents. You’re grinning from ear-to-ear, happy that Pein had taken your idea on.

Akatsuki Night In: Party

“Hmm…” you say, pressing your finger to your bottom lip. “How abouutttt…-” You click your fingers. “Let’s have a party!”

You hear a few yells of approval, and Hidan calls, “Fuck yeah! House party!”

You laugh. “No, Hidan, not that kind of party! I mean a real party! Dancing and waistcoats and champagne in small glasses!”

Akatsuki Night In: Drinking Game

Oh dear. To put it politely… oh dear. As you hadn’t managed to think of one single thing to do in over ten minutes, the job had been passed onto someone else, and that someone was Hidan. It had only taken him 0.4 of a second to make up his mind on what to do. He had dashed off, leaving you all in suspense, reappearing moments later with two crates of sake, announcing to you all,

“Ring of fire, anyone?”

Akatsuki Night In: Film Night

“Let's watch a film!” you say happily. Everyone nods and Deidara grins.

“Let's watch a scary film, un! Tobi, grab some popcorn!”

“Yes sir!” Says the masked boy enthusiastically. He scurries from the room, off into the kitchen.

So all of you pile onto the chairs and the sofas, then Hidan picks out a scary film at Deidara request. The blonde bomber looks over to you and smirks.

Akatsuki Night In: Truth or Dare

"Okay, truth or dare, ____?" Kisame says with a grin. It had been his idea to play truth or dare, since you hadn't thought of anything in time... unlucky. Tobi had suggested baking cookies but that was ruled out after the last time; and the less said about that the better.
You stare at Kisame, weighing up your options. Well... the obvious dare he's going to choose is something to do with drinking; it is Kisame after all.
“Dare!” You say with a smile, confident in your choice. You watch the blue man closely, then your smile falters when he gives you a toothy grin.

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Rufus

“N-nine?”
You look around to see who you've got. Your eyes dart the length of the room before you see someone getting up out of their seat. Rufus Shinra. Crap.

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Rude

“Seven?” you ask, already on your feet and raring to go. Now unfortunately for whoever the person is that you'll be spending seven minutes with, you're in the middle of a mega sugar-rush. Unlucky them.
You falter for a second when you see who it is that stands up; not really knowing Reno's partner, Rude, that well, but it doesn't faze you for long.

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Yazoo

“Eight!” you say, looking around to find your partner. One of the silver-haired brothers rises to his feet so you give him a smile and say energetically,
“Hi!”
He gives you an amused look then heads over to the closet. You get up and follow behind him feeling surprising optimistic considering the stories you've heard about the brothers from Cloud. To be honest, you are actually rather curious about him. Surely he can't be that bad?

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Genesis

Special setting:
The night after the party you go to sleep in your bed, laughing at all that had happened. No sooner do you close your eyes, you reopen them to find yourself back in my living-room, where the party had been. The room is full of people you have never met. You look around and spot three males sitting just away from you on the sofa, all looking at you. One of them smiles.

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Angeal

Special Setting:
The night after the party you go to sleep in your bed, laughing at all that had happened. No sooner do you close your eyes, you reopen them to find yourself back in the living-room, where the party had been. The room is full of people you have never met. You look around and spot three males sitting just away from you on the sofa, all looking at you. One of them smiles.
“You didn't think we'd let our old friends have all the fun, did you?”
You take a step back.
“What do you mean?”
”Let's just say we all used to know Cloud...”
“No, I mean what do you mean by have all the fun.”
One of the males, a boy with black hair and a goofy grin on his face, says,
“You're playing seven minutes in heaven with us!”
You nearly fall over.
“C-come again?”
To cut a long story short, you realise you must be dreaming and decide to play along with it. You end up sitting in between two of the males, and then the third passes you a...
“A glove?”
The boy shrugs.
“It's all we've got.”
You laugh and pull out a piece of paper. What's on it?
“W-w-wings...?” You say.

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Zack

Special Setting:
The night after the party you go to sleep in your bed, laughing at all that had happened. No sooner do you close your eyes, you reopen them to find yourself back in the living-room, where the party had been. The room is full of people you have never met. You look around and spot three males sitting just away from you on the sofa, all looking at you. One of them smiles.
“You didn't think we'd let our old friends have all the fun, did you?”
You take a step back.
“What do you mean?”
”Let's just say we all used to know Cloud...”
“No, I mean what do you mean by have all the fun.”
One of the males, a boy with black hair and a goofy grin on his face, says,
“You're playing seven minutes in heaven with us!”
You nearly fall over.
“C-come again?”
To cut a long story short, you realise you must be dreaming and decide to play along with it. You end up sitting in between two of the males, and then the third passes you a...
“A glove?”
The boy shrugs.
“It's all we've got.”
You laugh and pull out a piece of paper. What's on it?
“A sword?”

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Loz

“Umm...six?”
You say shyly. Your face flushes red when everyone looks at you, and then a guy with short silver hair stands up. He walks into the closet and then you stand up and follow him, only to feel a hand on your shoulder. You turn quickly to see another silver haired boy glaring down at you. You look at him and say timidly,
“C-can I help you?”

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Cloud

“Five!”
You look around to see who's getting up, and realise it's Cloud. Your best buddy, Cloud. You've been friends with him since you were both very small, having known each other since Cloud's time living in the village with his mother. You are both very close.
When Cloud gets to his feet and smiles at you, you jump up and run over to him and then the pair of you go into the closet together.

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Reno

“Four?” You call out. You look around and notice someone getting to their feet. It's Rude.
You give him a smile then head off into the closet, followed by the bald headed man. you totally miss the pair of eyes staring at you from the living room.

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Sephiroth

“Two?” You call over the noise. You know exactly who it is when Cloud stands up and draws his sword. He turns to you and says,
“____, you don't have to go in there with him.”

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Kadaj

“Three?” You look around. “Who has three?” No body answers. “...Three anyon-”
You are suddenly blindfolded and someone throws you over their shoulder, putting their hand over your mouth. You make muffled attempts at screaming, but nothing really happens, except you hear a voice calling,
“Go bro!”

FFVII ~ 7 minutes in Heaven: Vincent

"N-number one?" you call out a little nervously.
You look around to see if anyone stands up and of course, as the game foretold, a man rises to his golden-coloured feet. He walks over to the closet door, never once muttering a word, then disappears into the darkness. You stare after him for a second then turn to me, looking somewhat scared. I give you a smile, help you up, then give you a hard shove, sending you toppling into the dark closet after your mystery man.

Writing Exercise: Dialogue

Every time a character speaks or thinks in fiction, that person's identity is being expressed.
---
"H-hey, mister,"
Henry looked round, feeling a tug on the bottom of his knee-length jacket. He couldn't see anyone, then he felt another tug on his jacket and looked down,
"What'cha want, kid?"
There was a little girl, her brown hair in pigtails, looking up at him with wide, tear-filled eyes, her hand still attached to the bottom of his jacket,
"I-I'm lost. My mommy told me to- to-" She scrunched her face up, concentrating hard on what exactly it was her mother had said for her to do, "Mommy told me to w-wait by the till but," She sniffed loudly, "I looked for mommy but I- I-"
The girl suddenly burst into floods of tears, wailing loudly. Henry, more focused on the growing amount of attention he was getting from the passers-by, said hurriedly,
"Well, wha'd'ya want me to do about it, kid?"
The four-foot child seemed to completely ignore him, continuing to cry loudly; attracting more glares from those walking by the pair. Henry rolled his eyes.
'Great. Got'ta baby-sit now! That's all I need.'
He twisted round so he was facing the girl, putting a hand lazily on his hip,
"Why'd you leave the shop?"
The girl, finally realising he was going to help, hiccuped, wiping frantically at her eyes with her tiny hand.
"I-I- I couldn't find mommy in the shop, so I- I thought she was not in the shop."
Henry sighed, reaching his hand up to run it through a mass of shaggy brown hair,
"Alright then, which shop you come from?"
The little girl scrunched up her face again, concentrating hard, but then instead of coming out with an answer she cried again,
"I-I don't know..."
Henry, seeing he was getting no where, decided to act the way he'd seen his next-door neighbour acting with her toddlers. He bent down, his face in line with the sobbing child's and said, his usually-frowning face lit up with a - slightly over exaggerated - smile,
"Well what was in the shop? Books? Music? Toys?"
The girl nodded her head, wiping at her eyes.
'Well which one?'
"Which one...uhhh... hunny?"
Oh, if Jack or one of the others could see him now... they'd be laughing their asses off. He was squatting in the middle of the walk-way with a girl crying her eyes out in front of him, trying to comfort her by calling her names.
The little girl sobbed again, then wiped at her eyes, muttering,
"T-toys..."
Henry slipped his hand forward into hers, then when she looked at him with bleary eyes he smiled again,
"I know where your mom'll be."
The girl, hearing the one thing she'd been hoping to hear, suddenly grinned a toothy smile, her tears stopping instantly.
"Really?" She jumped up and down vigorously, nearly pulling Henry's arm from its socket. "Take me to mommy! Take me to mommy!-" She stopped jumping up and down suddenly, remembering what her mother had told her to do when she wanted something, "Ummm... please can you take me to mommy?"
Henry nodded, standing back up to his usual height,
"Sure."
He turned on his heel, the little girl clutching tightly to his hand and then he walked along the street, heading in the direction of the only toy-store in town. As he was walking he looked down, feeling the girl swinging their arms about. She was looking straight ahead, a wide smile on her tiny face. He couldn't help but smile.
A few moments later the pair arrived at the doors to the store. Henry looked down, pointing towards the doors,
"This it?"
The girl looked up and down at the doors, studying them hard, then after a moment she nodded enthusiasticaly,
"Yeah! This is where mommy told me to wait!"
She went to run ahead, but Henry kept hold of her hand. She looked up at him with big, curiously eyes.
"Don't run off. Don't want to get lost again before we find your mom."
The girl grinned again, nodding her head,
"'Kay!"
She pulled Henry forward then tried to open the doors with her one free hand - though she was trying to pull when it said push. Henry laughed and pushed on the door above her head, opening it to let her through. She dashed forward excitedly again, pulling Henry along all the while.
The moment the pair were in the building Henry stepped back in alarm, hearing a loud cry of,
"Amy! My baby! There you are!"
A woman dashed over, ignoring the other children and parents around her, too focused on holding her little girl again. Henry didn't have time to say anything before Amy's hand was pulled from his as her mother picked her up and span her around joyously.
Henry smiled slightly, glad to see the two were reunited - glad to see Amy's grin.
'Well no point stickin' round.'
He turned round, taking hold of the door-handle and pulling - only as he was doing so he heard a cry of,
"Wait, mister!"
He turned, only to have the small girl collide with his knees to send him toppling over backward. He lay there momentarily in a daze, then sat up, rubbing the back of his head. He was going to yell something, but then he saw Amy's big eyes staring at him. She was grinning.
"Thank you for helping me find mommy, mister!"
He sighed, dropping his hand back to his side,
"Don't worry 'bout it. It's Henry by the way."
The girl grinned, nodding her head again,
"Thank you, Henry!"
Before he could stop the small girl she dived forwards onto him, wrapping her arms around his neck in a slightly-too-tight hug. She kissed him on the cheek, grinning from ear-to-ear. He turned his head slightly, bashful from being thanked - something he wasn't used to, being a teenager and all that.
Meters away from the pair, Amy's mother laughed through teary eyes.
'Well I never ... look's like my Amy's made a new friend.'
Henry turned his head, trying to avoid another kiss from the little girl. He was smiling properly for the first time in a long while.

The Beach

(A small writing exercise I had to do in English, describing a beach)

My beach is nothing like your beach; a normal beach. On a normal beach there would be soft golden sand, and if the tide was in, shimmering blue water. My beach however, instead of fine sand, it is made up of litter and broken sea-shells – deserted for such a long time by anything living. The water is a murky brown and I have never known any different. Perhaps my beach was beautiful once, but now that time is gone.

Kidnap Mister Naruto

So for my first post I'll give you something that usually gets the reader laughing (though you might have to watch the show 'Naruto' to get the humor). It's my rendition of 'Kidnap the Sandyclaws' from The Nightmare Before Christmas (Put the song on as you read, it helps!)

Kidnap Mr. Naruto

Konan, Deidara and Sasori left Pein’s office in silence. They walked down the corridor together and then they began to think of the upcoming mission…

'Konan: Kidnap Mister Naruto?

Deidara: I wanna do it!

Sasori: No way hoe!

Konan: Pein said we should work together.

Sasori: Three of a kind!

Deidara: Birds of a feather!

All: Now and forever! La-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la! Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, he’s really not that bright, jump on him and make him scream, give him such a fright!

Konan: First we’re going to set some bait (ramen) inside a nasty trap and wait. When he comes a’ sniffing we will snap the trap and close the gate!

Sasori: Wait! I’ve got a better plan to catch that stupid foxy man! Let’s pop him in a boiling pot and when he’s done we’ll puppet him up!

All: Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, let’s rip out that fox, take over some villages, we are gonna’ rock!

Konan: Then Mister Crazy-Immortal man, can take the whole thing over then!

All: He’ll be so please I do declare, that he will skin him bare! Weeee~!

Deidara: I say that we take a lit bomb; leave it on his door and then, knock three times and when he answers, Naruto will be no more!

Konan: (smacks Deidara on head) you’re so stupid! Think now, if we blow him up to smithereens, we may lose some pieces and then Pein will beat us black and green!

All: Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, make him really sad, beat him up with ramen-sticks, see if he gets mad. Because Pein and the Akatsuki are the meanest guys around, if I were on their target list, I’d get out of town…

Deidara: They’ll be so please by are success,

Sasori: That they’ll reward us too I’ll bet!

Both: Perhaps they’ll make the special brew, of miso-ramen stew!

All: We’re Pein’s little henchmen and we take our jobs with pride, we do our best to please him, and stay on his good side.

Konan: I wish my cohorts weren’t so gay!

Deidara: I’m not the gay one!

Sasori: (rolls eyes) yeah…no way [sarcastic] (dodges low flying C1 bomb)

Konan: SHUT UP!

Deidara: Make me!

Konan: I’ve got something; listen now, this one is real’ good you’ll see! We’ll send a (gigantic) toy fox to his door, upon there’ll be a note to read. Now in the fox we’ll wait and hide, until his large stupidity, entices him to bring it in, and then we’ll have him…

Deidara: Ka-ching!

All: Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, poke him in the eyes, break his arms and crack his back, tell him lots of lies. Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat; chop him into bits, Mister Crazy Immortal-man is sure to get his kicks! Kidnap the Kyuubi-brat, see what he can see, (A/N: He can’t see! You’ve already poked him in the eyes!) Lock him in a cage and then throw away the keee-EEEy…!'

Konan started to giggle as they continued walking along the corridor and out of the exit to the base. Kisame, who had been listening to the whole thing from further down the hall, said to himself in a terrified whisper,

“…W-w-what…what just happened? THEY ALL BURST IN TO SONG?!" He threw his hands over his head, "THEY’VE ALL GONE CRAZY!”

Itachi walked up behind Kisame and said quietly,

“Haven’t they always been crazy?”

Kisame, who hadn’t sensed Itachi coming up behind him, jumped a foot in the air and then fainted on the spot. 

Itachi smirked and walked off.